I will be turning 48 in a few weeks, however, I spend most of my time with young women in the 20’s and 30’s. Most of the time I am mentoring them and giving wisdom from my white-haired existence whenever asked. I spend a lot of time listening and some time praying for them. I find they are all generally looking for hope and encouragement from someone who has already made it to the other side and is still standing and smiling.
It still surprises me how much I absolutely adore my moments with these brilliant young ones. They often think they are infringing on my precious time and are leery to ask for more. The truth is I laugh the hardest in their presence. They are keeping me young. I simply love them, and although most of them are 20 years younger than I am, I value them as some of my closest and most treasured friendships.
I have this burning sense that we are embarking on a fresh and new season for all females on the earth right now. More women than ever are embracing powerful government and political positions. The earth has never seen so many female leaders in business, education, and entrepreneurial endeavors, nor have women ever had a stronger voice or bigger platform for real change.
There is a shift in the spirit and in the earth, and God’s women are rising up!
There is a mandate in scripture that sums up the job of us older women.
“Guide older women into lives of reverence so they end up as neither gossips nor drunks, but models of goodness. By looking at them, the younger women will know how to love their husbands and children, be virtuous and pure, keep a good house, be good wives. We don’t want anyone looking down on God’s Message because of their behavior. Also, guide the young men to live disciplined lives.” Titus 2 (The Message)
I urge all older women to rise up and to spend time with the younger women in your circles. Invite them for tea or wine and just listen to their hearts. You were not created to fix them. You were created to love them. It’s not intimidating when you are just being yourself, being vulnerable, sharing your past mistakes and what you learned from them, sharing the times your heart was broken, and showing them that disappointments did not destroy you, but you were simply learning the art of overcoming.
This younger generation, the ones that are always getting fingers waved in their face, the ones always being criticized for the way WE raised them, the ones being put down for thinking differently than we do, need hope, guidance, and the understanding that they are different. They are brilliant!
They are gifted, creative, love community, crave adventure and experiences. They love face to face time with someone that values what they think and feel.
This generation, the one younger than me, often struggles with knowing how to deal with pain and failure. They’re sometimes full of fear, anxiety, and depression. I’ll be damned if I just walk by and leave them in it, without reaching out and reassuring that God did not create them to stay in those places. I would rather adjust my own life and time to show them how to bring God into the shame and hurt and let Him heal it at the core.
We have to rise up as the mothers of the land and call our daughters into their greatness. They, in turn, have to wake up from their slumber. They were not created to fumble through life unsure of what they were even created for, frozen in fear, and stifled by anxiety.
You don’t need to be a professional counselor or have a degree in theology to change the life of a beautiful young soul. Just listen to their hearts, fears, and questions. You will find their struggles are not that different from the ones you have already walked through, and when you start talking, your mouth will be filled with wisdom you might not know you possess.
The young single ones want to know if there will be a man that will pursue and love them— just tell them your story of waiting and wondering as well. Tell them how a man won’t save them or complete them, but a covenant with a truly good man requires the heart of an exceptional woman who knows her value, and conducts herself as a woman worthy of deep respect, by the way she speaks, acts, and prays. Tell her she will attract a man that is as emotionally healthy as she is, to never stop humbling herself, and to never stop embracing being female, with all the beauty, curves, and strength that make being female irresistible to good men.
The young ones who are trying to have a family want to know that God sees them. Tell them your story of becoming a mother through adoption, being a stepmother, or struggling with years of infertility. Cry with them, and give them hope that becoming a mommy may not always come the way they thought, but it will come.
The young women that are spending their days wiping little mouths, little butts, and countertops, need you to tell them the truth— that having little babies is the most physically exhausting season in a woman’s life. They need to hear your stories about how you miss the cuddles and the snuggles, but you love sleeping through the night, not constantly stepping on an unseen lego, or changing diapers in airplane bathrooms. Tell them how every season in motherhood is absurd and wonderful, and every season ends, as a new one opens with different challenges and new joy.
We older women need to rise up and embrace our own season that contains a little bit of knowledge, and some incredibly valuable wisdom. All we have to do is open our mouths and our arms, and they will both be filled. I promise.
These young women in their 20’s and 30’s have taught me so much, brought me so much joy, and have been so faithful in my own times of grief and heartbreak. They keep me young, and they keep me laughing— at myself, at life, and at the amazement of being born female.
We are commanded to rise up as mothers to all the daughters. They need us and we desperately need them. Watching their eyes being opened, their hearts being healed, and their disappointments being replaced with hope is one of the greatest joys we can experience on earth.
Start with a cup of tea, two listening ears, a heart full of love and some truth filled with hope, and just watch what happens.